Author interview and giveaway: Catherine Gildiner
I recently had the pleasure of reading Catherine Gildiner’s newest book After the Falls. I was engrossed in her story and captivated by her writing, so I was thrilled when I got the opportunity to ask her a few questions. I’d like to thank Catherine for taking the time out during her book tour to answer these questions.
Did you find it difficult to open up to the world about your life and your family? Was it therapeutic in any way?
It was really therapeutic for me to write the book. I stopped blaming myself for what I thought was the failed relationship with my father. I began to realize that I was only a teenager caught in the stage of ‘teenage rebellion’ when my Dad became very ill. If he had lived longer we probably would have been good friends by the time I was in my twenties. Interestingly, when I was writing I heard the words of Roy, the delivery car driver from my childhood that I worked with daily delivering drugs for my father’s drug store, telling me that a relationship is a whole lifetime not just the last few years. Those words gave me great comfort.
Also I didn’t include ‘the-cheerleading-acne-section’ in the first draft. My friend from high school, Leora who read the first draft of the book, told me it was a mistake not to include it. She said it exposed the importance of unflawed beauty in the 50’s and 60’s and illustrated how women had no other options but to be pretty. Girls were not valued for intelligence, athletic ability or assertiveness then. I think the episode embarrassed me so I had left it out. I found it difficult to see myself as vulnerable and rejected. Now that I have included it and have had to talk about it at book clubs and book festivals, I no longer find it embarrassing. I realize I was crushed by the rejection as any other teenage girl would have been.
In the spirit of keeping my questions spoiler free, I’m not mentioning anything specific, but why do you think your parents kept so much of their past hidden from you?
I think my parents, particularly my mother, was so traumatized by what had happened fifteen years before I was born that they had made an unspoken pact to never mention it. All families have secrets and they are often fiercely guarded. The only reason it came out was that my father had a brain tumour and as his defences were eaten by cancer cells, he talked about ‘the secret’ forgetting that it was a family taboo.
To answer your question specifically I don’t think the secret was kept just from me. I think my parents went into complete denial. Immediately after the tragedy, they moved to another city, my father got another job, and neither of them ever mentioned it to anyone.
Do you think your unconventional childhood influenced your career choice? Has it helped you in your career?
It depends what career you are talking about. I was a psychologist for 25 years before I was a writer. I didn’t become a writer until I was 50 years old. I will explain what my childhood had to do with each choice.
In my first memoir about my childhood years from ages four to thirteen called Too Close To the Falls, I recount an episode where I stab a boy with a compass who has been pulling my hair out every day. Roy, the delivery car driver, said the boy was a bully and I had to hit him back with something sharp when he wasn’t looking so he would back off. One day in grade four when we were dividing angles in math with our compasses, I turned around and stabbed the bully in the hand with the compass. He was whisked to the hospital and I was whisked to a psychiatrist. I describe in the book how much I liked the small kingdom of tiny chairs and games that Dr. Small had set up in his office. I also liked the idea of being in charge of deciding who was ‘sane’. I thought at the time when I was six or seven that I would rather be behind the desk than the patient in front of it. The image of that office and the cards he showed me of ‘Blacky the unhappy dog’ never left my mind.
The second thing that turned me to psychology was traveling with Roy in the delivery car. I realized at a young age that there were several ways of dealing with the world. The stabbing episode taught me that. First there was my parents’ republican view of law and order. (“Tell the teacher you are being bullied.”) The rules of the Catholic school system (“Offer up your sufferings to Christ”) and the third reality which was Roy’s (“You have to give him a taste of his own medicine.”)
When I was young and entering the lives of many different people delivering medicine, I began to wonder what makes people tick. When we delivered to prostitutes and the convents as well as the rich DuPonts and the poor natives, I would try in my childish way to figure why there were so many layers to society. When I grew up and eventually had the chance to take psychology courses, I was thrilled to see some of these questions addressed.
In terms of my background leading to my writing career, I would say that my mother was my greatest influence. She never once judged me. When I would come home from school and I would tell her about my antics for the day, she would laugh at all the funny parts and say I really knew how to ‘spin a yarn’. She was never a disciplinarian, but rather encouraged my stories instead of trying to ‘straighten me out’ or showing me ‘the right path’. I think that allowing me to have such free expression encouraged me to write down my life story without worrying that people would judge it. I think there would be many more writers in the world if they hadn’t been ‘shut down’ at various stages of their development.
My unconventional childhood has helped me in both of my professions. I was taught as a little girl to talk to everyone that we delivered to and everyone who came into the store. (My father said that was ‘good business’) So when I was in a hospital setting as a psychologist I could talk to anyone and was used to it. I had also seen all walks of life so I was at ease with almost everyone and I think the patients picked up on my sense of honestly relating to them. When I had to deal with murderers on the Forensic floor of the hospital or wealthy housewives who couldn’t decide on a fabric for their couches– I could relate to it all!
I had also learned from my mother and from Roy not to judge people. My mother didn’t think it was her job to judge me and Roy never judged anyone. When I would ask Roy why someone was in jail as we were driving to Attica Prison, he would say, they probably did something we have all thought of doing—but they got caught.
As a writer I was very lucky to have met so many characters so early in my life. They were like a huge family for me because I spent my time on the road with all of them. In my fiction and my non-fiction those same characters have appeared in various forms. I think the earlier in life that you meet different kinds of people from your nuclear family; the more they get embedded in your unconscious.
How have the people featured in your books reacted to them? Have you heard from any long lost friends after they were published?
The book has been out in Canada for a year and has been on the best seller’s list. I did send a rough draft to the person I called Leora in the book and also to her family. I didn’t want them to feel I had revealed too much about them. They all loved it and were only surprised that they had remembered so much. It will be ‘interesting’ to hear the feedback from the rest of my high school and college.
Are there any plans to write the next chapter in your life?
I am almost finished with my third volume which will be my last volume. (Everyone knows not much happens after you marry!) It is tentatively titled The Long Way Home. At the end of After the Falls I go off to study English literature at Oxford in England. So the first third of the book is about my life at Oxford and all of my cultural clashes. The second part is about my student teaching in the Hough area of Cleveland during the riots in the 60’s. The teachers had to be escorted to their classrooms by the police. The last third is about moving to Canada and going to Graduate school at the University of Toronto where I got an M.A. in English literature. Then I discuss my ‘conversion to psychology’ where I got an M.A and PhD. in Darwin’s influence on Freud. (I have always been interested in the biological nature of instinct.) Woven through the last third is my work at a psychiatric hospital and ultimately finding love (not at the psychiatric hospital.)
Thanks to Diane Saarinen, I have one copy of Catherine’s latest book to give away. To enter to win AFTER THE FALLS by Catherine Gildiner, simply fill out this entry form. Contest is open to US and Canadian residents. I will use random.org to determine the winner. Contest ends at midnight EST Friday, November 26, 2010. The winner will be announced on Saturday, November 27, 2010. Comments are welcome (and appreciated) but will not get you an entry in the contest.
Ack! It says I don’t have permission to access the giveaway spreadsheet! And I am SO THERE with this author. She talks a language I understand.
Thanks for letting me know, Sandy! I got it fixed and added your entry.
Finally someone who says I speak their language. Do you know what music that is to my ears for a woman who lives with 3 sons and a husband. No one speaks my language!!
Fabulous interview, Kathy, and I have now added both books to my TBR list as a result.
Molly thanks. You know if I’d ever had a girl I was going to name her Molly. It is such a warm name.
Glad you liked the books
What an interesting and provocative interview! I am now really interested in reading this book, and think the author sounds like a tremendously interesting person. Thanks for sharing it with us, Kathy. It’s so neat to be able to connect with authors in this way!
I am very excited about this book. So much of what I’ve read about it interests me and some of it sounds so familiar in terms of my own family, things I’ve heard from my mom and her siblings. I also think because Catherine Gildiner was a psychiatrist for 25 years the insights in this book will be fascinating as well as very telling and honest.
Thank you so much to both of you for this giveaway!
~ Amy
Dear Amy,
I hope that you relate to the book. You sound younger. I just did the book with a high school and I loved their responses. They said it is a lot easier to be an assertive female today. It was great to hear that things are different now. However they say that boy girl relationships are exactly the same. Yikes.
Thanks for this interview. Your review had made me interested in this book and now this interview has really sparked my interest.
I know. I also thought her questions were great. That is why they were so easy to answer.
Your questions are fantastic — as are the answers. I can’t wait to read this one!
I really enjoyed the interview. It was interesting to hear about her earlier memory. It really illustrates the “fight or flight principle”. She fought back with the bully with a compass. When I kept being hit and kicking by a bully, I took the flight alternative. I walked two blocks out of my way to avoid a bully. I wonder why they didn’t sit down with her and ask her why she did it rather than send her directly to a pyschiatrist.
CarolNWong(at)aol(dot)
Carol I wondered the same thing. I don’t think I ever would have struck back if it hadn’t been for Roy telling me to do it. I thought it was great advice. Believe it or not that bully came to one of my book talks. He thought it was all really funny.
This one sounds really good and of course I want to read it and find out what the secret is.
I would love to have had a visit! Now I have to write a third volume to meet you
wow you have so many giveaways going on this week! i have to restrain myself from entering since i have wayyy to many books and my reading has gone down ever since i started school.
isn’t it hell to be in school when you want to read what you like. I remember it so well. The greatest thing about graduating isn’t getting a job, it is being able to read what you want.
Great interview
Glad you liked it. They were great questions. I hope you like the book
Thoroughly enjoyed this interview!
Are you related to Sandy Hoffman or Joey Hoffman? It is a common name but I thought I’d ask
Terrific interiew. I have added yet more books to my TBR list
What a great interview!!!!
Interesting interview and the book sounds right up my alley. Had to enter
Natalie
Hope you win.
Really enjoyed reading this interview which highlighted not only the author’s life but also piqued my curiosity to read her life. Well written and a true conveyor of Catherine intelligence & spark.
Wonderful interview! I love her statement of “Everyone knows not much happens after you marry!”
Yeah like that is a well kept secret–right?
Thanks for the giveaway. I love books about the 60′s and 70′s.
Hi Kathy, I really enjoyed the interview particularly on the question on how the author’s unconventional childhood influenced her career choice. I’ve entered for the giveaway (I do have a US address) and now hoping for the best.
You know I didn’t realize how it had affected my career choice until I wrote that.
Dr. Small, the psychiatrist, actually came to one of my readings. He has since passed away. He brought me the Blackey cards I talked about in the book. He also said he resented that I called him ‘Puny’. oops.
Great interview! Thanks for the chance to win!
Great interview, Kathy! Not becoming a writer until she was 50 is encouraging
Bermuda Onion did a great job with this interview. I am now a permanent fan. You guys are organized.
What a great interview!!!
Thanks for the giveaway!!!
I am so looking forward to reading this book. I read Too Close to the Falls and shared it with one of my friends. I asked for the book back and had to wait and wait because she’d shared it with her mother who had to read it AGAIN before she returned it to my friend, who finally returned it.
I’m ready for another “ride” with Cathy!